Why Does God Allow Pain and Suffering? My Personal Journey through the Valley

🌑 Why Does God Allow Pain and Suffering? My Personal Journey through the Valley

I remember the hospital waiting room like it was yesterday. The smell of coffee that had been sitting on the warmer too long ☕, the harsh fluorescent lights, the sound of the clock ticking too loudly for the silence in the room. I sat there clutching my Bible, but truthfully, I didn’t feel like reading it.

A loved one was behind those double doors, fighting for life, and I was left with the question many of us carry at some point:

Why does God allow suffering?

It’s one thing to study suffering in a theology book. It’s another thing when suffering barges into your own story. That night, God and I had a very raw conversation.

🤔 The Universal Question

If you’ve ever whispered, shouted, or groaned this question into the night sky, you’re not alone. From Job sitting in ashes, to David crying out in the Psalms, to Jesus Himself weeping in Gethsemane—Scripture doesn’t shy away from pain.

In fact, the Bible doesn’t present suffering as a puzzle we can fully solve. It presents suffering as a reality we walk through—with God at our side.

📖 What Scripture Says About Suffering

The Bible offers us multiple windows into the “why”:

1. We live in a broken world.
   Romans 8:22 says, “We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time.” Pain is part of the fallout of sin entering the world.
2. Suffering can refine us.
   James 1:2–4 urges us to “consider it pure joy” when we face trials, because they produce perseverance and maturity.
3. Suffering can display God’s glory.
   In John 9, when asked why a man was born blind, Jesus said, “This happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.”
4. Suffering connects us to Christ.
   Philippians 3:10: “I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings.”

Notice: Scripture doesn’t deny suffering. It places it in the context of a bigger story.

🌊 My Valley Experience

That night in the waiting room wasn’t the only time I asked “why.” I’ve asked it when relationships fractured, when prayers went unanswered, when anxiety knocked me flat, when I lost someone I loved.

At times, I wanted God to give me an explanation. Instead, He gave me something else: His presence.

I’ll never forget sitting in my car after leaving the hospital one night, completely undone, when a verse I hadn’t read in months surfaced in my mind:

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18)

It didn’t erase my pain. But it anchored me in the truth that I wasn’t abandoned.

🛑 The Wrong Answers I Tried

In my struggle to make sense of suffering, I stumbled into some unhelpful “answers”:

• Pretending it didn’t hurt. (Spoiler: it still did.)
• Blaming myself. (As if suffering is always punishment—it’s not.)
• Trying to “earn” God’s favor to make it stop. (That’s not how grace works.)
• Comparing my pain to others. (Pain isn’t a competition; all suffering matters to God.)

Maybe you’ve tried some of those too. They didn’t bring peace. But God’s Word and presence did.

✝️ The Cross Changes Everything

If we want to understand how God relates to suffering, we have to look at the cross.

God didn’t stay distant from our pain. He entered it. Jesus experienced betrayal, loneliness, false accusation, physical torture, and death.

When I sit with people in grief, I often remind them: we follow a Savior who wept at the tomb of His friend Lazarus. He doesn’t just allow suffering—He suffers with us.

And through the cross, He redeems suffering into something that can produce hope. Romans 5:3–4 says: “We glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”

🌅 Glimpses of Redemption

Looking back on seasons of pain, I see ways God brought redemption I couldn’t see in the moment:

• Suffering deepened my prayer life. (I prayed more honestly when I was desperate.)
• It softened my heart toward others. (I listen better to the hurting now.)
• It reminded me this world isn’t my final home. (Suffering makes me long for heaven.)

God didn’t waste my valley. And He won’t waste yours.

🌟 Practical Steps for Walking Through Suffering

If you’re in the valley right now, here are practices that helped me:

1. Lament honestly. God can handle your tears and anger. Read Psalm 13—it’s raw.
2. Lean on community. Don’t isolate. Share with trusted friends or your church.
3. Look for small mercies. Even in pain, God’s goodness shows up—in a meal brought by a friend, a timely verse, a moment of quiet strength.
4. Hold on to eternal hope. Revelation 21:4 promises a day with no more tears, mourning, or pain. That day is coming.

🙏 A Pastoral Word to You

If you’re asking, “Why does God allow suffering?” I won’t pretend I have a tidy answer that removes the sting. But I can tell you this: God has not abandoned you.

I know, because I’ve been there. I’ve wept on the bathroom floor. I’ve wrestled in the dark night of the soul. And yet, I’ve found Him faithful.

Pain is real. But so is God’s presence. Suffering is heavy. But so is God’s glory.

And one day, all our “whys” will be answered in the light of eternity. Until then, we walk by faith, knowing the Shepherd walks with us through the valley of the shadow of death.

🙏 A Prayer for the Suffering

“Father, for the one reading this who feels overwhelmed by pain and loss, surround them with Your presence. Remind them You are close to the brokenhearted. Give them the strength to take one step at a time. Fill them with hope that suffering does not have the final word—Jesus does. In His name, amen.”